Having fun on a match?

I don't mean to sound ist, but most of the time men tend to be larger and stronger than women, and that is usually enough to cause problems. Different martial arts have aspects that make them valuable under specific cirstances, but there is no one superior technique, each cirstance has it's own inherent distinctly different aspects. It would be wise if you and your beau used your energy in a more productive direction. There is no such thing as a "friendly" physical altercation, it isn't wise to head in the direction your question seems to be pointing. Good luck.